...
Needless to say, I had no idea what I was getting myself into.
When I moved into my apartment here, I met the landlady's son Yazin. He is 23 and supremely patriotic and westernized. I asked him about the local Jordanian football teams and if they were a big deal. His response (with a look of disgust and disbelief): "Of course, man. They are the only deal."
Fast forward to today. I get to the athletic complex for the Opening Ceremony. Yes, for intramural football. Luckily, being a patriot, I brought a full size American flag with me. So, Olympic-style, we walked out with the other teams we would be playing against and presented our flag in a formal ceremony. Here are the other teams in the league:
- Iraq
- Syria
- Somalia
- Lebanon
- Palestine
- Jordan
- Turkey
-America
Israeli support aside, at least my country has been responsible for loss of life in ONLY 3-4 of these countries, right? Silver lining.
I have never been booed harder in my life. Not even in high school CPS soccer games at schools like Prosser and Amundsen. Not at high school lacrosse games at Mather. Not even at Lindenwood.
Now, to be fair, I feel like it is trendy in this region to boo America and was not indicative of any actual wish to do harm to us jihadi-style or anything. The Lebanese team was openly nice to us, cheering in our section during our game and everything. They even taught our fans an Arabic football cheer, "No matter what you do, America shakes the world!" Fuck yeah!
Number 15 is about to shake up this kid's ankles.
There was only one guy who seemed vehemently against our team in the stands, but I feel like he was just playing to the crowd. Not that he even needed to. Somalia beat us in a clean game 10-1. I guess, in a sense, that whole Black Hawk Down incident was repaid a little today...
Our next game was the big one: America vs. Palestine. Jesus Christ, why don't we play Iraq, Nazi Germany, and Colonial Britain while we're at it...
The crowd for the game was insane. There were at least a dozen undercover secret police officers in the crowd, as well as campus security. Class was canceled so American students could cheer for our team. We already had a day to practice, as well as some new blood on the team, and we were feeling pretty confident. Then we saw the Palestinians warmup.
...
Three of their starting five play on either the PALESTINIAN or JORDANIAN NATIONAL TEAM. Unofficial odds put us as losing at least 15-0. We lost 9-2. The crowd went insane.
There is an 18% chance that this is a Team America goal...
We then played Syria and Lebanon, beating both teams in 4-1 and 3-1, respectively. The Syrians received surprisingly little support from the crowd. Unfortunately, our goal differential kept us out of the playoff bracket. But, our NGU (Never Give Up) attitude got us an article in the national paper! And a visit from the Lebanese Ambassador and other Lebanese dignitaries. FOR AN INTRAMURAL SOCCER GAME.
It really must be the only deal here...
This showing of fan appreciation was for the pre-game warmup...wow...
No comments:
Post a Comment